limping toward the light

The people of El Camino de Emmaus on December 26, 2010

Hola buen Compañeros!
As many of you know, one of the primary life lines that keeps me semi-sane is El Camino de Emmaus. This is the name of the small but wonderful Hispanic community of faith with whom I walk. The name means "The Way of the Emmaus Road", which is a reference to the path that the grieving disciples walked immediately after Christ was crucified. Luke 24 tells us the story of the risen, but unrecognized Jesus who fell into step along side his devastated friends and walked with them for a while. Jesus drew them into conversation about their shattered dreams and gave them some perspective on the long, long road stretching behind and before them. The scripture says that "their hearts burned within them" as he spoke, but still they did not recognize him. Finally, when darkness began to fall, they found a place to stop and urged him to stay and eat with them. At this simple yet strangely familiar meal, their eyes were suddenly opened in the breaking of the bread.
This little story is one that I come back to again and again as a source of inspiration and sustenance on this crazy road that is cancer (and life for that matter). Indeed, my heart burns within me in these strangely rich days as I vacillate between desolation and hope. Some days it feels as if I am gathered in the company of great friends for a warm meal on a cold winter's night. Other days it seem that we are only beggars huddled against the cold, holding out our hands toward the warmth of a burning barrel fire. My point is that even when I feel lost and alone in illness, I know that I am never truly alone. Not only am wrapped in the support and compassion from so many of you, we walk in the company of all who are mortal and who have suffered. We are surrounded by a whole host of humanity, winners and losers, heroes and beggars, saints and sinners beloved of God, all. I am grateful that perception is not reality. Stars still shine whether we can see them or not. "Ubi caritas, et amor"...where there is love, therein dwells God.  See you down the road...    Love, Mary  PS: to my non-religious friends, please forgive what sounds like a sermon. This is where I find life.